I'll just go ahead and say that some days I feel like an awesome mom. Other days I feel like pretty much the worst [insert role here] in the world (mom, wife, person). But I always love my kids. And I always. Always. feel like there are more things to do.
It seems like no matter how many dishes I wash or clothes I fold there are still at least 3 more things on my To Do list, or at least my "I should do those soon" list. In the past I've compared these keeping-house tasks to being on a treadmill because there's always further to go and it feels like you don't actually get anywhere.
Recently I've had two insights into this mindset.
1) Could it be that the "treadmill" of keeping house & parenting is actually a picture of Kingdom work? There is always more work to be done in my heart, in my home, & in my neighborhood. If I learn to be "faithful in little", not over-working at home but striking a balance of work & rest with my family & the Lord, perhaps I will be "faithful in much" as I work for the Kingdom.
2) I recently read a blog that compared parenting to climbing Mount Everest. It is SO. HARD. and yet when our babies are grown & we reminisce about this time, we will cherish the memories and rejoice in raising this kids that we have (Lord-willing).
I guess what I'm getting at is that I want to see parenting less as a treadmill & more like climbing Mount Everest. It feels like it will take forever, but I know one day (again, Lord-willing) my boys will be grown up and my place in their lives as sole caregiver will come to an end. I also want to see parenting as a picture of my role in the Lord's kingdom. I want to be faithful in this.
I want to trust that the Lord will take care of what I can't.